Taurus man taking things slow

Ok, so we meet 9 years ago in highschool. We quickly fell in like and he completely pursued me and it was great. Then just as quickly somthign changed and he backed off. He started dating someone else. We remained friends. We hung out in a group of mutual friends. Some time passed and he was single again and we were still friends and we hang out just us cuddling and he was pursuing me and I really wasn't sure what was going on. At the same time another guy hit on me and we ended up dating. I found out about a week after I started daing the other guy that he was upset and that he thought we had a thing going, I hadn't realized that, but stayed with the other guy for about a year. When the other guy and I broke up we were all still mutual friends.
I was single for a while and then started dating someone outside of this circle. He also started dating someone outside of the circle. We were still friends and still hung out from time to time, but were just friends, but every time our others weren't with us, the conversation would quickly turn to "back in the day." This went on for a few years, lots of talking and no action. I ended up leaving the guy I was dating and started dating my husband. I was incredibly happy and life was fine. He attended my wedding with his girlfriend and I was as happy as I thought I could possibly be and we were friends.

He ended up dating someone new and telling our mutual friends that he really screwed up and wished he was with me while he was with this new girl. I was not told this until recently because I was happily married. Well, my husband passed away. It was horrible and tragic and I am still in so much pain about this. When this happened, our mutual friends were around my life a lot again. I ended up hanging with him because he is one of these mutual friends who were trying to keep me busy and comforted. I was leary to do this because i know how we are with each other and didn't want those feelings at the time, but he was genuine and just being a really great friend.

Fast forward a few months and we were still hanging out all the time and the feelings started creeping in. I brought it up to him, and he admitted that he felt them too. I told him that I needed to wait because i was not ready for a relationship yet and he agreed. We still hung out and our close freinds are aware of what was going on. He was pursuing me and things were fine. Then things got weird. He told me that he thinks that we need to take things slow and that he doesn't want to rush me. He told me he is afraid that he is my rebound guy. I have tried to tell him this is not the case, but i don't think he believes me. We have told each other we love each other and i know he is telling the truth. Now he is vague and weird and only responds to about half my texts and it is a long time in between them. i have told him i don't want to take things slow and he insists that it's the right thing to do.

He is making me crazy. i am not sure if he is just buying time and doesn't know how to let me down or if there really is something there? Any suggestions.