Need help from Capricorns on a Sagittarius Capricorn relationship

by VASCA
(ROMANIA)

I had a capricorn and now I don´t. I miss her voice. We've been together for 2 and a half years. The story is much more complex and we both suffered in it and we both were sky high in love. So I'll do my best explaining:
The first year wasn't that intense, but it was ok. The second year she went to college and I stayed home and that is when things got a little loose and at the same time tighter. She did something that made me think she cheated. If I tell you the whole story you will agree no matter if you are a capricorn. But at the same time we loved each other more since that and I've seen her real face and I bet no one ever did. The bad thing was that I felt a little insecure and started pushing and we had a lot of fights and crying. Things got a little better above the floating line a month or two before I had to go to another country to work for a year or so to come back home and pump up my future.

We felt such intense love that when we talked she was almost all the time crying of happiness. This went on for a month or so. After that I was confronted with a lie of hers that started arguments and fights. I am a little impulsive. I became jealous and because she kept a lot for herself being cautious so we weren't getting anywhere. I made her cry a lot of times. I kept pushing and pushing asking for explanations and asking for more and telling her to decide if she wants me anymore.

The last month I had depression because of our fights and some other issues. It aggravated me to the point I was having panic attacks and I was working with people. I told her. I don't know if she believed me or not because I wasn't getting support although I asked her to support me. Until the last fight when I told her to decide again. She called two days after that and said it is better that we split up. This happened inthe last year.

More details:
We were at the point of promising our lives forever together no matter what. We swore that we would never give up on each other as long as one of us still had the need for the other. We made future plans. I never cheated on her although I am a Sagittarius. I lied a little at first but as time passed I was like an open book when it was needed. Our trust went back and forth all the time because of most of the fights. She neglected me when it came to messages or calls and I started to get pushy, etc. Good and bad.

When she said she'd made up her mind, that she wanted us to split she was crying and cried for 35 minutes. She listened to all my begging and all she did was to cry and say that this is better and that I am asking too much and that she wants her future. I tried some more and at that point when she said that now is the moment to make a career and after she gains a career she will devote herself to her man fully. After all that she said she had to go because she was talking from a friend's phone and she repeated herself for 10 minutes or so. This went on until she said that her friend wanted her phone back and that she had to hang up and didn't want to do that in my face. She hung up in tears. I tried to call her but she didn't answer.

The next day I asked her brother to make her answer but she didn't. After that I sent her a message "if that is what you want I will respect your wishes".
I want her back no matter what but it is pretty hard. There is no contact at all. I want to get up out of this mud because as time passed the last year I've become weaker and weaker. I pull myself together and keep my promises to fight for her no matter what. I will give her 3 months until I go home. Until then no contact. And I will build myself back up again.

The worse thing is that I don't know how to get any contact with her because all I will have is 2 weeks or so and then she goes back to college and we don't have any common friends or live close to each other. I love her. I don't want to put myself above her or lower than her and I want to fight because she and we deserve it. It is worth having children as we planned and talked about and be happy where ever we are. I need help and suggestions from any and all capricorn females. She is 20 and I am 22. I want to do what it takes to make this work.