Funny experience with a Leo man

I dated a guy once for three weeks to a month...not a leo and not an important love in my life nor a love at all...if anything a fling... Nice man left on a respectable note with each other we just had nothing in common...the experience lasted a blink of an eye and there was no matching interests so we both stayed friends and moved on...two months later I met a wonderful man whom stole my heart...I fell in love quicker with him then I have fallen with any other man...and more true than any relationship....no matter the length or love...this man had me truly after our first date

We have been dating for about a month 1/2 on my 26th birthday...morning of, we got it on like two romantic lovers from Spain......I had never....never felt passion like I did when his lips were kissing mine.....and I new....the way his skin felt to me and the way I felt laying next to him as he was snoring....that I was in love......the same morning I went downstairs to get some water wearing nothing but his knee high socks and as I was filling my water from the automatic fridge thingy, I looked up and saw a picture of "my love" arm in arm "Best Buddies Picture" with.... the man previously that I had briefly went out with... I nearly dropped my glass of water in a panic...and naturally freaked out in my mind and almost out loud yelling fuck...fuck...fuck..what are the chances...I immediately started wondering if they were a casual run in run with a circle kind of friends....since there was another person in the picture standing in the middle of the two

I figured maybe there was a possibility and hoping, that they weren't.....two days later he left for his trip to Tokyo,
which I knew about ...and was excited for him...I figured at least it would give me a good opportunity to figure out how & why I was falling in love with him and how exactly was I going to tell him that before dating him, I briefly dated, "Dated being an understatement" someone that I saw on his fridge....lol why is this city so so small....anyway...I figured without thinking about it too much, that the right thing to do was to just be honest...give him a heads up...and again be honest...so later on if they happened to be good friends than at least I told him on my own...even though I never even dated the two at the same time and that there was never a cross over between the two I still felt that I had done nothing wrong....non the less my policy has always been love...loyalty...honesty...so I waited for him to come back from Tokyo

Meanwhile from the moment I saw that picture on his fridge....any
phone call I ever received from the man on the fridge...which I did...he did still call me...I never answered nor returned the phone call......it wasn't because he wasn't a nice guy or that there was anything bad about him....it was strictly because I was in love and even if my guy didn't know that....and of that I knew....it didn't matter I knew I was in love and therefor anyone...any other.....meeting of a man of any type didn't matter.....SO SO SO....he gets back from Tokyo...asks me out to dinner...he made dinner reservations and he happened to be sicker then a snot nosed kid that had been playing in the snow all day....so I thought and admired the fact that he wanted to see me when he could have been relaxing at home getting better before another trip of his....he had another two week adventure that he was leaving for the next day, therefor it was the only available day that he had open and at that point as well as mine...

Funny enough I was out of my right mind...and had the evil
monthly woman thing which apparently makes me act like an idiot...and all my rationality seemed as if it never existed in the first place...it went right out the window...and during the middle of a perfectly fine dinner his phone rang....he said oh this is my good friend *$#@...I gasped and out of my mouth fell out.....I dated him for a brief amount of time nothing big, just wanted you to know...I was aware luck wasn't my thing but apparently, timing wasn't either....so of course I sat there waiting for a response...freeeking out in my head...and he turns and looks at me with this shocked stare/long long glare...only for his response to be...is we have been good friends since 8th grade....if that means anything he, is now 33...so yes...it of course it does...it might as well be his best friend....if not already....(my god)...I felt my heart drop to my stomach...

Before I knew it I had that sharp pain that only comes from either being stabbed (which I haven't experienced) or from your
heart actually breaking...and then it suddenly hit me....If I know myself and knew that he liked me....knowing I had felt like shit and was absolutely hormone crazy....why did I even go in the first place? I was setting myself up for absolute failure...anyway...I did plan on just mentioning something but damn what a way to screw something up....anyway....that was the first night we
had hung out and not spent the night together....I asked him to drive me home....and there was no way in hell I was going to even try to kiss him...in fear of being rejected...though I missed his touch so much...he just looked at me in disappointment and I hugged him said and thank you diner & good night....he is now gone on another adventure and I am just lost....and thinking
there is a pretty good possibility he might not even come back to me at all....hummmmmmmmm the pain of love and and opening your heart my my....and he doesn't even now how strongly I really feel...me being coy roy...:((((

well at this point all I can do is wait....and hope he comes around....by the way he's a leo....I'm a cap....we aren't supposed to match...at all....but even though my communication is sometimes crap undre pressure in fear of being hear
broken... we have still somehow communicated with our eyes...heart and soul....I just wished those were the features I only' payed attention to that night....instead of butterflies and open mouth syndrome....which apparently I suffer from...:) Well I might have lost the love of my life but at least I was
honest to and for him and not for selfish needs......by the end of two weeks if I hear nothing I'm sure that will be the answer, sad but that's life and it's true...the glass my NOT be half empty nor full....maybe it's just half. either way....I respect him so much which is why I said something....it may not have
been the right moment but I think it was more important to say something than nothing at all....I still love him...:)