Cancer man drama

by Carol
(England)

I am a Aries woman and a Cancer guy found me, talked to me everyday, spent alot of time with me and then circumstances led to him hiding in his shell for 1 month. He stopped answering phone calls, texts etc and i can tell you it was a serious blow to my ego.

I nearly just gave up on him and moved on as it was really getting me down. I think only curiosity made me carry on pushing for an answer and then finally he came out and explained himself...... i can tell you i wanted to give him a piece of my mind but i tried to empathize.

It is getting harder and harder to communicate with him when he is going through these turmoils and to make it worse he has asked me to marry him. I am addicted to him in every way, he makes me crazy but when he's in front of me, absolutely everything is forgotten and forgiven.

Just when i think i am strong enough to tell him this isn't gonna work, with one look he makes me melt. This hibernation period he needs to get over everything and anything is just too much. I know this is his way of dealing with things but i feel abandoned, left out in the cold and for us to share the rest of our lives together....

i don't think it is possible. I thought i was being selfish therefore felt guilty for being angry with him but the silence kills me, sends me into my own paranoid craziness.

Comments for Cancer man drama

Click here to add your own comments

And . . .
by: Anonymous

. . . .what did you decide? What happened?

I was so struck by your post because the identical things are happening with my man who has a moon in Cancer. It is incredible.

I also have a friend with a man in Cancer--the same thing is happening to her!

I still don't know how I'll deal with it, so I'm curious to know what you decided

same situation
by: Anonymous

I am an Aries woman and have the same problem. My Cancer man was acting very kind and soft for about 3 4 weeks. Then he went on vacation for a week and when he returned he was a completely different person. He wouldn't talk to me or even look at me. It was a huge blow for me, 'cause I really liked him (still do) but I just don't know what got into him. Do Aries women scare Cancer men off or something??

Hibernation?
by: Anonymous

I have been dating a cancer guy for awhile, he has never went into hibernation. He would rather spend all his time with me and then go back to his house and play video games. We both love video games. We play together and he doesn't seem to mind. When he is playing I sit and watch and I don't bother him. That's his hibernation but he makes a point to take time for me, he has never ignored me. I guess maybe we have been together since high school and we made plans after to be together in the same home. I am an Aries but the thing is that I am one but I don't act like one. Cancer totally changed my sign and I totally changed cancer. We are exactly alike.and we both need our time but we never hibernate.

loving cancer man is tough
by: Anonymous

You are not alone. I've experienced the same type of pain. It's this hot and cold thing that they do. I am a taurus woman in love with a cancerian man. they are so loving and lovable but yet when they give you the silent treatment, it's almost abusive b/c you don't even know what you did and since they don't talk to you at all- you don't even know how to solve the problem. it is also true from my experience that they can be tricky, slippery, and great at mind games b/c they are so intuitive. i know it so hard but ultimately decide what is best for you.

Resist falling for this game!!!!!!!!
by: Anonymous

The post boards are full with this topic. Cancers are the best at this push pull head game. The best thing to do is refrain from chasing them. Confront them about it a couple of weeks in person about it and set down your boundaries. But that is the trick it's not what you say but how it is said. It has to be loving and respectful, but the bottom line is that the behavior is borderline abusive.

cancer man is in his shell
by: Anonymous

HELP: I met this cancer man about 2 months ago and we hit it off right from the start, he has been 100% honest with me from the beginning .
this passed week told me he needs time to take care of family matters which he told me about and are quite serous, and to live my life as if he didn't exists,Ive told him from the start i don't want to play any games and that's why he said this.i asked if this was an excuse to end the relationship he said no, so i asked if he would like me to give him time and space to take care of things i think he said yes but as my head was spinning i cant remember his answer, but he kept asking if he could call me to see how i was doing,i said yes and that i would like that. so i e-mailed him that evening and said i didn't want to give up on this and i have no problem giving him space and time with in reason, that was 2days ago...
no reply as of yet,he always got back to me it sometimes took hours but always did.

i truly want to believe him but am very guarded at the same time....

anyone experienced similar? should i just move on?

I'm Libra and hes cancer in spite of the negative we really get along and we have tons in common hobby's culture etc..

re
by: Anonymous

One never knows when dealing with someone else, but just from personal experience:
Just really give him space and don't expect any contact from him for a while. If he calls you soon--great. but it may happen that he really won't be able to handle emotionally all the things going on in his life in a way that you would like or expect. You would need to decide for yourself how long can you wait for him to sort these things out and whether you can handle his withdrawal. Don't question your emotional connection, trust in the good things that you experienced with him, but see for yourself how long you can go on "living as if he didn't exist"

Same here!
by: Anonymous

I'm an Aries and dating a Cancer man.
I'm in love with him and when we are together, everything is great! After our latest date, he turned cold. So I wrote him an email saying I am moving on.
But he replied and told me he had been distant as he is facing a personal health crisis. After his explanation, I felt so bad. So I told him I am here for him. Instead of replying, he again went into his shell. I left him a message on the phone and then he sent me an sms saying he needs to think by himself and tackle the crisis. Told me he will call me in a week's time. That would be tomorrow!
I am thinking, if this is the way problems will be solved then our relationship would be a sad and lonely one. :-(

liberating partner
by: Anonymous

I am so amazed at the similarities to my own situation that I have just read.
I am a taurus woman deeply in love with a cancerian man who has stopped communicating with me for 6 weeks now. The last time we communicated was by txt where he said the problem he was facing was nothing to do with me.
I have been so distraught and felt rejected,also thought he must have a new girl but my intuition told me different. I was hurting so much I had to hve a reading from a tarot reader who told me something legal was going on with his son.
She said he loves me very MCH but just needs time to deal with his problems,and he'll be back. Well I couldn't believe it. This led me to find out abt cancer traits and this website.

On Off ??
by: Anonymous

I am an Aries woman dating a cancer man if you could call it that. I too am experiencing on off experience. I had no idea there were so many other situations like this. Could it actually be a Cancer trait? I am very honest and have tried to set boundries and no matter what I do it doesn't work. On the plus side he is a remarkable person just can't get him over the line.

Cancer man personalities
by: Constance

Hi, yes I'm going through the same thing dealing with a guy that I am in love with, that's a Cancer sign. Wow!!! Dont even know where to start. Cancer men is everything a woman dream of being with, until their moodswings, stubborness and silience gets in the way. I'm a Pisces and this is the second relationship I have had with a Cancer guy. They are very possesive and want let you go, no matter what may happen. We always have times where we want even talk for weeks at a time. Then he would be the first one to call as if nothing never happened. I'm very talkative and love to communicate, but the cancer dosent like talking unless it consists of him. When a cancer man gets angry he wont answer to your phone calls, texts, vm, fb, emails or any other form of communications. Dont worry he will come back around eventually. Cancers make excellent husbands, if you can deal with the silence killer and jealousy. Im in love with my cancer dude. Every sign and guy has flaws. Take the good with the bad and move on knowing as time passes love and life gets better with that special person you love so dearly. Cancers got what it takes, they are loyal and at times liars. Ive learned dealing with a Cancer guy you have to
really take the time out to care and notoure them like babies. They are very sensitive and just dont know how to open up especially when they have been hurt in the past. Give them plenty of space. Inside of that crab shell is love for you, but they just dont know how to open up to you. Remember if any man take time out to deal with you, he like something about you.

Listen Up Ladies
by: Nikki

I started this year off with the Cancer man's hibernation/ abusive absences. All I have to say is it is not worth it. And after I realized this and moved on I was engaged in 6 months. Getting married in 9 days. Have you ladies calculated at the male Cancer's pace how long it would take you to get to this point with one? Why waste your time and beauty on some man with such a weak ego? Other men know how to trust their feelings and don't need another mommy to help them walk through it. Do yourself a favor. Walk away with some however little self-respect you have left.

don't play their game!
by: Anonymous

We have seen each other a few times but its the same game he plays...So I have had to move on,I can NOT make him a periorty when all I am is an option to him..it isn't easy to do I still care bout him but I have to think about me..and anyone dealing with the same BS should do the same..

My cancer man
by: Anonymous

Am a scorpio,dating a cancer man,yesterday d 25june marked our one year buh am yet to kw his house,office,village,friends n am even beginin 2 doubt dat he is wat he says he is,dat is his job,he has not even had sex with me,ma cancer man says he loves me yet has nt shown any prove of it,i know he has a very painful past buh he has refused 2 come out of it,wen he promises 2 see me,he nev shows up n does nt even cal to appologise until i cal,den he wil gv his xcuses,says hes sori n wen i try teling him how hurt i am he gets pisd off n switches his phone.i hav nev seen his naira notes,he nev buys anythn for me rather am the one that do the spending,he says he wants to marry me buh has nt come to my house though he kws the location,d one dat pises me off is dat wen he says hes sik n cals,i tel hlm 2 permit me to visit buh he says i cant trace his house,i rem the time he promised to gv me moni for a problem i nided to solve buh on the said day,i kept caln him,it rang several times buh no response,wen he finali piked,he said he was already closed to hs home outside the place i live without letn me kw he planned livn town,dat he needs to treat himself which is more important than ma prob which has to do with my education,n wen i started cryn cos he ws my only hope,he switchd off n i cried my eyes out,i tot i had smbody.u wont believe all dis happened on our so cald anniversary date,n uptil d next day he has not cald to kw wat happened.i forgot to mention that i do not even kw d car he use s buh i sure do kw he has a car..he says he wants to marry me,atfirst i tot ds was all a test of ma love buh i do not kw wat to believe nau cos it gets worse by day.pls wat do u think pals cos ma own problem seems to b d worst among others,i love him so much and he kws dat but does he loves me,wat is goin on in his mind,he says it evryday dat am his wife so wats dis whole attitude all abt,wat do do,shld i quit...weneva i try to do dat he runs bak pleading,calling.am getn frustrated,if am stil naive,i wuld hav said am infatuated buh no i can telwhen am in love,pls i nid help,wats hsld i do?shld i kip waiting 4 him or shld i dumb him?cos dis my cancer man can leave the states without telling me,yes i jst think so n wil not b suprise.jst wen i tot iv found true love after ma past hatbreak especialy on d fact that he is not so keen abt sex.he said he wil make love to me b4 our weding buh i s there reai gona b one cos am beginin to doubt.

Treat them the way they like
by: Nikki


Ditch the losers they pray on women with low self-esteem. Think about it with the Cancer's weak ego if he thinks badly of himself, and you constantly showing your unconditional love for him. He is just going to think even less of you. My best friend is married to a Cancer. Treats him like crap, used him, her brother lives at their house does not pay rent, she is a full-time student. And her Cancer takes care of them all. And now she wants to leave him(for no good reason). And guess what he is begging her to stay! Take advice from someone who has been there ad done that. And who knows it is not worth it.

they are no good!!!!
by: Anonymous

Im a aries n been on and off with my cancer man whos now my ex ..we been on and off for about a year and i broke up withim like evry week!..i dont no y i dated him..they have alot of female friends they mite seem like friends but if u undrtand hw to read ur cancer man u realize they have a motive n its never a gd 1..they are big flirts n the cancer guy i been with was 1 n dwn the line i learn he n his friends had sumthing in the past! Just dum like y he aint tell me?!..instead im with him looking stupid to chill with him n his ex thinkin they are friends!..smh but wat really made me feel the need to keep leaving was his emotional self ugh!.wine wine wine! Always about money n jis wants..but when i want to be loved it was to much for him!but when he want money sex n material things i must be there or he will have a tantrum foh
.i left him for him for gd this time..ima aries who dislike immature crabs!

Disappearing acts
by: Anonymous

I am an Aries woman. So I met a Cancer man in December 2011, and was introduced by a friend. The first time I met him it was the best feeling everrr...and I had recently broken up with my ex of 6 years. I was not in the mood to meet or date anyone, but he really swept me off my feet the very first day we had dinner together. Then he disappeared from January till May with no replies to my texts or calls. He then text me in May and we started talking again and this time he wanted me to be his girlfriend after talking for a few days. But I didnt want to rush into things because I was afraid of being hurt again. He got upset that I didn't want to, and so I agreed. The very next month, he tells me that I deserve better than him and he doesn't want to be in a relationship. Then again in June, he wanted to work it out with me...but with the regular disappearing acts that go on with cancer men ALL THE TIME, which drove me nuts. Now, we are supposed to go on a trip together and talked last week about it and he was soo excited...but i'm being ignored again. My friend who got us together said that the two of them have been texting each other...which really irritates me because he has been ignoring me. Anyway, so my friend said that he wanted to talk to him about me. I realllyyy hope it's not bad because I really do care about him and I'm trying my best to be patient with him and he said said that he loves how I give him space because he's falling for me even more. But right now I;m afraid he's going to hurt me. Should I ignore this man till he gets his act together? or should I text or email him telling him how i feel?

Same drama everytime
by: Anonymous

Hi im a single mum and im a taurus, im in love with my cancer man his italian. when im with him i feel very special and loved. when we go out we always end up arguing because he wont stop loooking at other chicks. and one day i saw him with his ph out in his hand talking to a girl in the club, when i approached him he said he was giving his cousins number to her. Im always the one txting him and saying sorry to him, he doesnt answer my calls or if he sees me calling he turns his ph off. he says he loves me and im speacial to him, but last night he made it clear that we are done finish. all ive been doing is crying. how can he shut me out like this. ive been seeing him since lasst year. omg all those months is was so hard to communicate with him, he shuts me out he doesnt msg or call me nothing. i love him soooo much. his great with my boy, sometimes his behaviour is very dangerous towards me. he has met my mum talked to my dad on the ph & my brother. when i ask him when is he going to introduce me to his family he always says i need to change my behaviour 1st. IM SOOO LOST CANER ITALIAN GUY :=(

OMG
by: Anonymous

Same thing i'm experience. I love this man very much and I know he loves me but my man kinda does the same thing as well. He is an cancer and i' an Aries. I only had sex with him one time. This man has 6 kids and I have one. I have talk to phyics and they say he hasn't cheated on me and he says he loves me.I have not seen him in over two months but he always working or with his kids. When I hear from my man I just melt away also. Please give me some advise of what I should do. I don't want to brake up with him I love him dearly.

on the verge of breaking up
by:

I am an arian woman, just proposed a time off with him. What you guys written were so true about cancerian men... sigh. I am kinda regretted to initial the time off. I hate the silent treatment.... and he hasn't responding to my text.... I guess it is over...... my impatience and his slow reaction just got the best out of us.... i want to end it but deep down i HOPE there is another chance for our r/s.... m confused. i couldn't stop sobbing...

Aqua girl cancer male 8 yrs of off and on
by: Anonymous

My cancer male is an unevoled and hates his birth mother, however he was raised by his aunt whom he loves and respects and calls his mom . My cancer male does hold on to the past and which includes exes even one night stands. He keeps tract of them all with fb lol. I caught on to that and deleted him off of mine. I have been his longest relationship and the one he has always respected. I am the one at every family gatherings. Even when our 2nd breakup and he left me and moved in with this girl which he thought he had me in his claws and that I would simply be there waiting and chasing. He so miss calculated me. Being aqua girl and the way he did it was disrespectful. I cut off all ties and made sure he had no way to get any info about my life and didn't speak w him for 7 mos. so he chased for about a yr while he was living e this other girl . He loves me I am 100 percent sure but he is immature and he does confuse infatuation with luv. I am very much like his aunt that it scary. He subconsciously seeks out woman that will use pity, manipulation, crying and guilt on him just like his birth mother. Then he tortures these woman and I am like really disgusted and sad. He simply does it unconsciously does it because they are much like his birth mother and he is paying her back in his mind and he wants out. We have never had a big blowout because we both no once we do it will truly be the end . He must sense that I am strong. He is jealous and possessive. He doesn't go after what he wants directly. He is wishey washey, moody, personality changes. I felt him pulling away and his exe which is also a cancer is playing games with him. So I pulled out because he will feel my lose more. I would rather be the one on the pedestal and the one he will always compare the rest that come along. I am leaving our destiny in gods hands now. If meant to be it will be

breakup..
by: Anonymous

"I am thinking, if this is the way problems will be solved then our relationship would be a sad and lonely one. :-("

True... so i decided to let go.. thou i still hv feeling for him... x_x

RUN RUN FAR FAR AWAY
by: Anonymous

A few weeks ago I befriended a Crab man and we hit it off..
We liked the same movies, he was funny and seemed well balanced saying things like, i cant let one relationship ruin the possibilities of finding a partner.
Sounds cool right.... one time he even called me, there were also the texts and i sent silly emails that was like borderline spam...but the cool thing was he text back saying so sorry been busy and its fine you emailing me...
Then after some drunken flirty texts from him there's been no contact...so curious and so strange... I'm a Pisces and i thought i was all over the shop....not so i think the cancer man can put me to shame.
So i ask myself what the hell? Sooo not worth the effort when i have lovely guy friends already that do text me back and also give a shit about how my day was.
So ladies i recommend RUN.. RUN FAR FAR AWAY and don't look back.

its true...
by: Anonymous

my cancer man broke up with me n doesnt give me a chance to love him one more time...is it all for 1 year relationship??he said that we gonna prove to others that we can manage our relationship...but not giving me one more chance??its hurting me much...

my bf
by: Anonymous

m a taurean,had living relation with my cancerian bf.everything is so perfect when hes with me.hes totally into me.but when ever he goes home(we were studying in same country away from our diff homelands n we are of diff religion)he stops picking my call,no reply to any msgs nothing.and it used to make me paranoid,insane.i had worst tym in my lyf.but 1ce hes back hes completely into me.but recently he finishd his course as he was in senior batch,but he had promised me he will come back to work here till my course gets over,and we both were quite serious about each other..but now he started completey ignoring me for 15 days.i pleaded,begged and did every possible thing to make him talk to me or atleast say that he doesnt want me anymore,he didnt respond,wen i made one of his freind ask him if we broke up,he said to him no he didnt ..then he had sum problem with his exams he again spoke to me whole day.bt wenever i askd him y he ignored by all these days his answer was 'i dont know'.n he didnt want to discuss about it.now im shattered n have no idea what to do except stop panicking and trying to contacting him.if 5yr living relation dont have any have any value for him then i dont know how to move on.

Cancer man
by: Deb

I met a beautiful Cancer man on Match.com I initiated the first contact by winking at him & favoriting him, within a couple of days I had several messages from him wanting a picture so he could see who he was talking to, after posting my pic this man writes back to me ,gives me his personal Email and we are off to a great start..After talking for a couple weeks online he tells me he would like to talk to me in real time, so I offer this man my phone # and NO response so I let it go. A few days later he writes back like that didn't happen so we continue on. I finally get the courage to ask him out and he has to work,butt tells me he would LOVE to get together with me. So after trying to meet up a couple more times, and him disappearing off line for a few days at a time ( no Emails) I wrote him a message asking why do you ask for my # if your not gonna take it, and I have tried to so set something up for us to meet, and you say you would love to then I don't hear from you for days. I would love to see where this goes with this very sexy cancer man, not sure what to think of him, I hope I didn't ruin this by sending that Email but I told him I don't chase a man, I'm looking for the same thing he is. Any advice I was going toEmail him to tell him I miss talking to him and leave my phone # good or bad idea. I am a pisces and I want to get closer to this man.

Cancer man
by: Deb

I send this guy an Email with my # two days later he sends me a response, he apologizes says he took a break on the the computer and will I forgive him he had a lot of chores to take care of. So I write back apology accepted, thinking maybe we can continue from here, but what happens again NO response I'm not really sure this guy is worth all this aggravation. I have already told him I won't chase him, So here we go again.....stay tuned...lol

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Cancer man.